I'm learning about "resentment", how it creeps up and winds itself around me. It's absolute poison to the soul and often I don't even realise that my skin crawls, my eyes narrow and my nose scrunches up at the mention of certain people... or the sight of them... or the sound of their voices.
I've made a list of people. Some of them have hurt me, some of them just annoy me to such a point that I bitterly dislike them. You know the expression "I just don't like their face"? Well, half the list are made up of unlikable faces. I've heard it said that the things you detest in others can tell you a lot about yourself... oh.crap.
I came across this prayer in The Big Book, along with the instruction to say it everyday for two weeks for the person I resent. I'll be busy for a few months by the looks of things...
"Dear God, I have a resentment towards a person that I want to be free of. So, I am asking you to give this person everything I want for myself. Help me to feel compassionate understanding and love for this person. I pray that they will receive everything they need. Thank you God for your help and strength with this resentment." (BB, Freedom from Bondage: pg 552)
Quite challenging hey? So if you think you're on my list... don't worry, I'm praying good things for you... even if my teeth are clamped shut, I'm still getting the words out. Nobody said it would be easy...
