Showing posts with label tension. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tension. Show all posts

Thursday, 27 August 2015

Honestly? Day 92 #100daysofwriting

Honestly today was hard. The pain in my neck, shoulders and jaw are extreme. It actually runs right down my back and into my bum. I hate complaining because I know people live with worse pain. How I don't know.

I went to physio yesterday and still feel bruised. I know I just need to let my body heal but I feel like my muscles are in fire. My head hurts so much that noises smash against my temples.

I'm lying in bed now wondering if I should move my clock into the lounge. Thank goodness the kid upstairs has stopped running laps.

I'm sore and tired, plus on a mission to develop healthy sleep patterns... so good night x

Tuesday, 18 August 2015

Decompress : Day 83 #100daysofwriting

Stretch up
Lie down
Twist left
Bend right
Nothing shakes the feeling
Sit up
Lean down
Turn left
Bow right
Nothing releases the tension
Up
Down
Left
Right
Toss
Turn
Twist gently
Bend
Break
Breathe deeply
Nothing shakes the tension

Wednesday, 8 July 2015

Cactus : Day 41 #100daysofwriting

Elbows on the table
Jaw in my hands
The dull ache
Breaks my thoughts
Someone
Across the room
Shifts uncomfortably
Released from my gaze
My out-of-my-mind gaze
A dull ache thumps
From my belly
My heart
I crack my jaw
I click my neck
Slow circles to release
The pressure
The ache
The tension
I drum my fingers
Against my empty glass
The table
My temples
I shake my head
Imagining my thoughts
Falling out of my ears
And on to the table
Then you'd know
The source of the ache
The tension
The apprehension
The denied expectation
"Why did you come here?"

Wednesday, 3 June 2015

Vents don't only let the fresh air in... Day 7 #100daysofwriting

At the absolute risk of moaning for a few paragraphs... I'm tired and my stomach feels insanely unhappy. I really don't know why, nor is calling in sick tomorrow even remotely possible - I sense some "sucking it up" or positive thinking is needed.

I suffer with shoulder, neck and jaw tension - from stress, bad posture and general anxiety. I more easily admit to depressive episodes than my general, tightly wound, anxious state. It explains a lot of the drinking I've done in the past, the need for social lubrication and my more recent white-knuckle reaction to large social events.

I'm trying to stretch and exercise to help with the tension build up. I have a great physio, but releasing the knots every 6 weeks is not the long term solution. I'm not perfect and frankly exercise can add to tension. I did a few moves on the Powerplate last night and felt way too rattled around in the head.

I've been to a surgeon who says I grind my teeth at night, so now I wear a grind plate - think hockey gum guard on bottom teeth. It helps but can make me gag a little. It worked until I went on that bloody Powerplate - insert sad face.

So yes, I think I rattled myself on the Powerplate and now my head hurts too much, resulting in a rubbish tummy.

Time to sleep
xxx