Moments of Motivation

I've always been a little obsessed with ballet.... strangely enough didn't ever go for lessons, but spend hours hovering on my tip toes with one hand on the kitchen counter and one hand on the chest freezer. I loved how weird feet look on pointe.
I used to prance around in hand-me-down leotards.... total fav was yellow with 3/4 sleeves, I even had one of those wrap around jerseys.... *sigh*

After doing the 15 minute ballet buns workout yesterday morning, I did a 40 minute barre work out last night. I'm about a million pliats away from my ballet body.... I want the grace and bendiness of a ballerina. They move so fluidly and can lift their legs so high. I want to be a ballerina!!!!

I am not sure if I mentioned that one of my "rewards" once I'm thin is a photoshoot. I'm busy collecting photos of similar poses I want to strike. Found some reasonable balletesque ones (as in I'm not wrapping a leg around my neck), so the challenge to be bendy is on!

Here are my latest motivational posters

I will post links to a few of my favourite youtube workout videos in a separate post soon....

Breaking Out Of My Chains

I remember seeing a YOU magazine article years ago, where a women claimed that she had shed piles of weight, just by the power of prayer. I was very cynical about it.

Over the last 18 months I have been on a journey of really drawing closer to God and have been so blessed. God gave me a PILE of blessings over the last year and the more I give over to Him, the better things go - figures right? Now, if you have got this far and are still reading, good.

I seem to be getting the same message from so many places, in so many different ways:

• We are the image-bearers of Christ
• Our bodies are our temple
• Jesus was super fit, He walked everywhere (Thanks Mom)

So, I started to think.... if I am an image-bearer... and should be following Jesus' spiritual example... maybe I should be following His physical example? God designed my body to be strong, to work the field and to get me places. How dare I flop into a heap? Then I heard a sermon on "work" and how it is good to work and how God doesn't want us to be lazy. These words almost haunt me. I was also reminded to dedicate everything that I do to God's glory (yeah, not easy!). So I prayed. I asked God to bless my diet, to give me self control and perseverance.

I just did my home work for the Beth Moore "Breaking Free" Bible study that I've joined on Saturday mornings. Working through a study on how we need to find our satisfaction in God, feed our souls, I came across two absolute gems of scripture.

"Why spend your money on food that does not give you strength?

Why pay for food that does you no good?

Listen, and I will tell you where to get food that is

good for the soul!"

Isaiah 55v2

 

"You satisfy me more than the richest of foods.

I will praise You with songs of joy."

Psalm 63v5

 

I have been slowly becoming aware that the root of my weight gain is comfort eating, I feel like I am breaking habits and teaching my body to be satisfied with better food. At the same time, I am feeding my soul like crazy and aligning my whole self-image to God's image of me.

 

Pray for me, wish me luck, whatever fits into your beliefs. I know that there is no way I would be making this progress, with such surprising ease, without God's help!

The Big 4

I have officially have shed FOUR KILO's in less than two weeks!!

I haven't really been open about what my start weight was, well it was 83kg... and now I'm 79kg, properly under 80kg :)

Cue the happy dance :) I love Dukan

How To Get a Butt like a Ballerina

I have been full of excuses this week about working out, so did a quick 15 min video this morning.... sheeeeesh... good workout, gorgeous new body role model!

Tell The World....

"I'm coming home
I'm coming home
Tell the World I'm coming home
Let the rain wash away all the pain of yesterday
I know my kingdom awaits and they've forgiven my mistakes
I'm coming home, I'm coming home
Tell the World that I'm coming"
                                                          - Skylar Grey (Coming Home)

I got addicted to the P Diddy version while travelling last year. I remember discovering it on the playlist on the plane just before I landed in London, tears pushing to get out as the fields rolled out beneath us. I felt so emotional, this was my first trip outside of CT, I was about to see my best friends from school (strange how so many of them ended up across the sea), I'd done something brave, and I'd been travelling for about 19 hours on a smidgen of sleep...

I felt like I was about to escape reality and that all my mistakes would be washed away, I'd be reborn in England. I was forever changed by leaving everything at home for a month. I grew, my eyes opened, I was inspired. 

It was my theme song on the way home, when I was really coming home.... almost like a prayer that I had changed for the better, that I would still be me, that my kingdom would remember me....

When Granny was sick and dying, she kept saying that she was ready to "go home"... I knew she didn't mean back to Pinelands. On the day that she died, I put the P Diddy version on and howled during the chorus.

And now, I have discovered the original Skylar Grey version by accident, and it is soooooo utterly moving.

Words to live by

This is EXACTLY how I feel and why I am on this journey

Just Say NO

I sit, tummy weirdly growly after lunch and I don’t feel very satisfied. I had an amazing salad, stuffed with veggies and steak…. I even had an egg… but I feel kinda huuuungry. Maybe because everyone else had sandwiches for lunch? We’re on a training course and all cooped up in a room together.

On Saturday night I was literally in the middle of free pizza and wine… my kryptonite. Somehow I sucked down sparkling water with mint and told myself I was fantastic. Dukan is easy behind closed doors, but not so much when you’re talking to someone wrestling with a super melted slice of pizza. If ever I wanted an exercise in self-control, that was it. I was so hungry for a snack by the time I got home, and biltong is a sore substitute. but, I’m getting thinner and that makes this all worth it. Just sometimes, sometimes….

NEW WEEK, NEW CHANCE TO BE AMAZING

Monday motivation...

It just feels wrong…

Dukan has proved to be surprisingly easy. Side thought, Dr Dukan is lucky to have such a catchy surname…. If I invented an eating plan and called it The Paine Diet…. I doubt I’d have the same cult following.

Over the last nine days, Brother and I have looked at each other a few times and wondered if we really are allowed to eat such deliciousness. We are :)

Lean bacon with fat-free smooth cottage cheese…. OMW

Gojiberry FF yoghurt (we’re allowed gojiberries in an any stage!)

Steak… with ham

Ostrich sausage (no cereals added)

As of today I’ve lost 3.5kg and Brother has lost 4kg. It is not the easiest diet to be on, but it’s also very very user friendly.

Day #7

Whoop whoop! Managed a whole week on ATTACK, so hitting the veg tomorrow!
About 3.3kg down now.... feeling good! Planned a quite night in, so expect some great posts over the next week or so ;)

Quick Thanks

Hey!
Thanks for all the hits yesterday, I'd like to believe that it wasn't just because you thought I might be knocked-up... I don't write this blog for hits, but rather support and for myself, but gosh darn it, it's good to see that people are reading my latest posts, and clicking on older posts too!

Anyway, thanks, you made me smile yesterday.

xoxo

PREGNANT?

Yes, the title is controversial enough to drive people to my blog.
No, I’m not pregnant; I’m just fat – that being the subject of this post.
Yes, people ask me all the time.
Yes, that is very rude.
Yes, but, I do have a big tummy.

  have been on Dukan for 5 days now, and have tried eating plans before. I’ve managed to shift the kilos off over the years, and then pile them back on… usually they bring friends. I am very determined to make this work and have already dropped 3kg to date. I have more energy and the flu symptoms that have bugged me for weeks are gone. (yeah, I barely believe what I’m saying either). This all said, I’ve decided to write this post, and hope that you won’t look at me with pity, but rather laugh along with me. It is a funny, yet very hurtful truth about my life.

FACTS
Most of my fat sits on my stomach
I’ve always had weak stomach muscles
Stress, food and even a full bladder bloat me
I’ve been accused of pregnancy at every weight from 60kg to 80kg…. possibly even at 58kgs where I looked like a lollipop. SERIOUSLY?

I will share some gems with you:

@ THE THEME PARK
The ride operator didn’t want to let me on the ride, insisted that I was pregnant and they couldn’t allow it. It was Ratanga, at Monkey Falls, so I just jumped into the boat with them screaming at me and me screaming back “BUT I’M NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT”

@THE BAR # 1 aka ON A DATE #1
I went to play pool with a guy who I fancied, he’s just taken me out for pizza dinner (cue bloat), but I was wearing a sexy flowy top – designed to hide the tummy and show off the boobs…. And we bumped into a friend of his, who wasted no time to ask if I was pregnant… even though I was on like my 2nd date with this guy AND drinking…. *cringe*

@THE BAR #2
I recently went to the Bay Harbour Market with Gorgeous Guy Bestie…. And we order cocktails; GGB looked so confused as the barman asked “One without alcohol, right?”…. And I melted into the floor…. I was sucking my stomach in hard that I almost fainted while making faces at GGB. Barman took this as his cue to say “Because she is pregnant”…. GGB doesn’t miss a beat and says “Well she isn’t”. I very suspiciously sucked at my Moscow Mule (don’t order one there, they’re not nice) and asked Barman three times if he had put alcohol in it….

@ WORK
Once while being frisked by security.... a few times by suppliers who were either happy for me or concerned that I was going on maternity leave.... once by a nosey new receptionist who asked me repeatedly if I was sure that I'd only been away on holiday, not maternity leave.

ON A DATE #2
The date was finished, but we popped into a store, the chain that I work for in fact…. One of the sales assistants’ asks me “Are you pregnant”…. I’m sucking my tummy and cheeks in as I shake my head, hoping the hottie I’m with hasn’t heard…. THEN she says “You’re not? Can I touch it?” And proceeds to rub my stomach…. Say whaaaaaaaaaat, yes…. Didn’t see the hottie again…. Fortunately because he turned out to be a tad dodge… not because of my hideous deformity…

COUNTLESS TIMES AT P ‘n P
Pick ‘n Pay is a grocery store (I say this because apparently I have a big readership in the Northern Hemisphere). Tellers like to ask…. Sometimes I let someone believe it because they offer me the last trolley…. I didn’t let it go when I was standing in line with my friend’s boyfriend, and a keen lady was rubbing my belly uninvited and grinning up at friend’s bf…. Guys never seem to know what is happening… he’s like “what was happening there?”…. my reply of “she thinks I’m carrying your baby” was not met with much approval… figures.

ON THE TUBE
Ok, so getting a seat while everyone else stands... in a foreign country.... yeah, I'll let that go. My skinny friend figured it out after she'd been ignored and I'd been offered a seat for the second time in the same day.... ;)

This is really just a select few occurrences, most of it blurs into:

A stranger is touching me…. “When are you due?”
“If you’re not pregnant, then why do you look like that?”
Suggestive hand movements indicating a large belly
Denial of alcohol and dangerous behaviour
Blushes
Awkward apologies
Or no apologies at all “well you LOOK pregnant….”

I accept it, it’s just embarrassing… it happens to celebrities every few months.... hopefully by the end of the year this will all be a distant memory…. Until I really do have a baby in my belly…. One not made of food…

Ok, look at that belly!

Eating.... again?

So.... Dukan.... Attack Phase.... I just eat protein... I am a carnivore... when people ask "Chicken breast and...?" My reply is anything from "just that" to "cottage cheese" or "ham"

I feel obsessed with eating, I've had 6 mini meals today.... and that's excluding supper. It's the only way I don't get starving and can actually face protein-protein-protein... with a side of PROTEIN. Don't get me wrong, eggs and ham.... yes, Sam I Am.... I will eat green eggs and ham. They are delicious! It's just my brain that says eating all the time and not eating veggies is JUST WRONG... but, good golly... I've got rid of 3kgs! In 5 days....

 

I am becoming a Hobbit.... (if you don't know, they eat OFTEN)

 

Guilt Is Ridiculous

I love writing, but I haven't been writing.
I love reading, but I haven't been reading.

I'm so tired and grumpy this morning.
The sermon from Sunday on "Working" echoes through my head... God doesn't like lazy people.... am I lazy? I can't focus on work.

Is this because I've been consuming protein since Saturday? FOUR DAYS already. Brother and I both dropped 2.5kg in the first two days. Now we sit.... unmoving.... is that why I feel like this?
I got up early and did yoga.... hanging upside down in Downward Dog until I almost fainted.

I've got my playlist ready, To-Do List handy... I'm getting my feelings out now..... cup of tea in hand.... "God make me focus" is my whispered prayer.

Here's the video I tried to do this morning.... I didn't finish it, but I can feel that I worked my legs.... small steps hey?

We Can Dukan!

I've googled every possible thing to convince myself that Dukan is ok for me, maybe I've been looking for an excuse?

But it seems:
- I can stick to plan while I recover from having my wisdom teeth out (in a few weeks time)
- Low carb is often advised for depression
- Low carb is good for IBS
- IT WORKS

I found this blog: http://southafricandukan.wordpress.com/
While it only has a few things on it, I like the motivational posters and SA retailer specific products.

Brother and I planned a few meals already, and cleared the fridge of "offending" products... fortunately we didn't have much in the way of "illegal" foods - about 100ml of fruity yoghurt, half a carton of fruit juice, left over low fat custard, and seeing as neither of us had managed to have dinner last night, it didn't seem criminal to have "fairly" healthy snacks (yes, yes the sugar.... but it's not PIZZA).

We will start tomorrow with eggs and yoghurt for breakfast. I'm planning grilled chicken breasts stuffed with cottage cheese and ham for lunch (yeah.... does sound AMAZING). I'm going to attempt to make galettes for dinner, maybe with cottage cheese and tuna.

Recipe for galette HERE. It's an oat bran based pancake. We need to consume 1.5 tablespoons of oat bran per day... so seems a great way to consume it!

Feeling pretty positive and pumped now. And yes, I will have pizza and wine tonight.... last supper, as it were....

Then, to focus on my new mantra:

PS: I did yoga last night, I am amazing

Sasko Sam... you best hide yourself....

Dear Devoted Reader

I seem to have been boldly throwing around the word “Dukan”… and now I’m screwed. Totally  screwed…. Don’t sign up for stuff before you have read the fine print with a telescope… I nodded sagely through “no carbs”, “no alcohol”…. And just lost my $h1t over the idea of “NO FRUIT”…. Say whaaaaaaaaat? What about an apple a day? 5-a-day? Ok, I can eat veggies…. Eventually…. But fruit? We’re looking at 3 months sans fruit and only if I can lose at least 15kg in 3 months.

 (I don’t know how long that apple has been sitting on my desk.... but I just inhaled it)

Brother is doing it with me…. And seems very excited about phase 1… which is where we eat ONLY PROTEIN for 5 days…. I was a vegetarian for 5 years…. Meat-only seems positively criminal. But, what’s that? I could lose 5kgs straight off? *mouth forms into a little O shape*

 People say don’t focus on what you can’t have, look…. You can have low fat bacon

 

*sniffs the air* “BACON?”

 And quark…. “What’s QUARK” …. No-one knows, it must be foreign…. *googles*

 “Oh, it’s a soft cheese… we like cheese….”

We have said we will start on Saturday… so I need to go eat a kilo of apples and the Sasko Sam mascot…..

xxx

PS: I know fad diets are totes un-PC, but this one works and it's only a few months of craziness....

Coming Soon.... some long overdue posts

Look out for:

*New diet challenge
*Can I actually complete a running challenge for once and for all?
*Gentle-Man-Bashing
*I thought I was part of your family (a humorous piece)
*Fashion Police - lifelong dream job