Friday 11 July 2014

A Sorta Fairytale #100creativedays Day 79

I’m writing a late post, yesterday after not sleeping a wink on Wednesday night, my only priority was sleep once I got home from work.

Weirdly that wasn’t to be and This Guy came over to talk, I suppose on my request. A half desperate request. This Guy is my ex, my friend, my kryptonite… who knows. I said I wanted to be his good friend, but I guess it was a lie. I wanted him to choose me. He didn’t, and I was very angry. Anger is horrible, it twists everything, and I get mean. I’m not as mean as I used to be, before I got sober and started working the steps, but I still have a mean streak.

In a weird twist, the one he chose apparently read my whole blog. It’s scary. In a way. So, Dear One-He-Chose, I’m sorry for getting angry. I really don’t want to be angry. Treat him well, he’s rather sweet.

So, yeah, he came over so we could get closure. In my half drugged sleepy state I think I got closure. I swear when he rang the bell I was dreaming of The K2 Twins… google it… nom. Anyway, closure. Means closing the door really, doesn’t it?

Now, my title… the title of a Tori Amos song – of course. I keep wanting a fairytale romance, right? We all want that. But we forgot about the other people in the story… maybe in this story I’m the ugly sister? The witch who got shoved in the oven? Time to close the book and find my own story?

Ok, I’ve waffled. Not sure of the point of this post. I’m sorry, ok? Let’s just listen to the song, it might be a bit more revealing than I’d like…

“and i'm so sad
like a good book
i can't put this day back
a sorta fairytale
with you
a sorta fairytale
with you”
- Tori Amos "A Sorta Fairytale"


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